Frustrations

So, I had planned to have my new domain up and running this morning, buuuuuut, I think I made a mistake when I was purchasing the domain when I also purchased the “personal website builder.”  As a result, I’m not able to access the blogger options I need to access in order to link the old blog address to the new domain.  So, I’m going to call customer support in the morning and get that removed from my account so I can proceed as planned.  I already have the new banner done and ready to go once I get the domain up and running.

So, I have an insomnia problem, not sure if I’ve really discussed it here much or not.  But, as a result I usually have a problem going to sleep and staying that way.  So, I’ve been taking NyQuil to help myself go to sleep and stay asleep.  The last couple nights I have not taken any NyQuil because I have forgotten until I was already in the bed and a cat was sleeping on top of me or I was so tired I didn’t think I needed it.  Anyway, the last couple days, I have had a LOT more energy the last couple days AND I have found it immensely easier to wake up with my alarm and be fully awake when I get out of bed in the mornings.  Sooooooo…I think I’m done with the NyQuil except for when I work the double (16 hour) shifts and I NEED to make sure I sleep as much of the 5 hours I have available for sleep between going to bed and getting up again as I can. 

I’m sure a lot of you are reading this and saying “DUH.”  But, I have been known to be a little slow to catch onto things a time or two.  I honestly didn’t think it was the NyQuil that was making me all foggy-headed and groggy.  But, now I know and I will stop using NyQuil to overcome my insomnia issues. 

Ren Fest, Biggest Loser & New Name

Are you lacking in motivation like I have been recently?  You have 2 choices, motivation or not.  You can do your workouts and eat right or you can sit on the couch and eat junk.  Either way, the time is going to go by.  How do you want to spend that time?  Do you want to spend it doing something good for yourself that will make you feel good or do you want to indulge in things that eventually make you feel bad and cause you bad health?  I don’t know about you, but I’m all for option A.  Now, that’s not to say I stick to it 100% of the time, but I do try.  But, sometimes, there are flare ups of my disordered eating and I feel powerless to resist them and end up driving to Jack In The Box or Taco Cabana or wherever strikes my fancy and buying junk to stuff in my face.  This is an ongoing frustration for me because, like I said, I feel powerless in those times.  I know, it “sounds” like a cop-out, but it’s not.  If you’ve suffered from an eating disorder or from disordered eating, you know what I’m talking about, but if you haven’t, then I’m happy for you that you don’t know what I’m talking about.

Anyway, my intention is not to write a doom and gloom post today.  I’ve been a little silent the last week and I’m sorry.  It’s not for any particular reason other than nothing came to mind to really write about.  Sunday I went to the renaissance festival (Sherwood Forest Faire) again and had a great time.  I bought a really cool, I don’t even know what to call it, hair crown (?) made of chain mail and has Swarovski crystals too.  I’m going back to the festival again this Sunday because the author of the book that was made into my favorite movie of all time (The Last Unicorn) will be there doing a signing.  I’m going to take my hair crown and see if they can add some chain mail webbing to the top of it so that it doesn’t slide down the back of my head like it does right now.  And I saw the bagpiper again and he seemed very happy to see me, kept hugging me, introduced me to the owner of the festival as his “future bride.”  <giggle>  Don’t I wish!

Monday I just felt like sleeping in so that’s what I did.  So I didn’t do this week’s long run until Tuesday morning.  But, it wasn’t much of a LONG long run, just 5 miles because I’m in taper right now for this Sunday’s half marathon.  It was a really good 5 miles too.  I had an average pace of 10:47 I think…very nice indeed.  So, since I didn’t do that 5 miler on Monday as originally planned, that means I have to do 2 runs back to back this week, but that’s okay, they’re both my shorter, 3 mile, runs.  This morning I ran 3 miles with an average pace of 10:28 so I was cruising right along (for me, anyway).  So, tomorrow morning I’ll run another 3 miles.  I think I have a second 3 mile course mapped out that I can run so I don’t run the same thing I ran this morning.  If not, then I’ll just do my 3.3 mile route.

So, on this Sunday’s half marathon (part of the Biggest Loser series), I had originally been scheduled to work a double, 16-hr shift tomorrow night, and then I work Saturday afternoon.  I checked the race’s website and I didn’t find anything saying there was going to be race day packet pick-up and so I deduced that my only option was the packet pick up Saturday morning.  So, I canceled my overtime for tomorrow night.  Well, today, the race director sends out an email detailing what all will happen during 11 and 4 on Saturday for the packet pick up and then it detailed race morning’s chain of events.  Right at the top of the list, at 6am is listed that the festival area opens and RACE PACKET PICK UP opens.  FML.  Seriously?  Then, at work today, they sent out an email asking for overtime for tomorrow night in the area where I was supposed to work but canceled.  I thought about emailing them and telling them that my plans changed AGAIN and I can work tomorrow after all, but then, I remembered that all the experts say that it’s not the night before the race that your sleep quality really matters, but the night before that.  So, after a little back and forth with myself, I opted to keep my overtime for tomorrow as is: canceled…in favor of a good night’s sleep.  Plus, there are other errands I want to run Saturday morning before and after packet pick up and before going to work.

I went to the fabric/craft store the other day and picked up some stuff.  I bought the fabric that I will use to make my first set of pixie wings with…it’s purple shimmer and oh my was it pricey!  $9/yd!  Good thing I had a 50% off coupon!  Anyway, I also bought the “Once Upon A Time” stack of scrapbook paper (12x12) so that I can start working on my renaissance festival scrapbook.  Then, I went on Amazon.com and found the “Once Upon A Time” 12x12 album for only $9!  So, when my paycheck hits the bank, I’ll be ordering that AND I’ll be ordering the hot pink boots that I will wear with my pink/lavender/purple pixie outfit that I’m going to make during my two 4-day weekends in April.  I have plans to wear that outfit when I go to the Scarborough festival in Waxahachie, TX sometime next month or in May with Amanda and our friend Vanessa.  My favorite photographers don’t have a booth at Scarborough, so if all 3 of us can go, then I’ll pay to have a photo taken by the Olde Tyme photographers, you know the ones that take like the Old West style photos?  Same people, but with renaissance in mind instead of the old west. 

I need to buy some more black ink for my printer this weekend so I can start printing out the photos from the renaissance festivals so that when I get the album I can start putting pages together.  Oh yes, I need to buy fairy and unicorn and other renaissance type stickers to add to the pages.  And some doilies and other things that are pretty and bring to mind renaissance festivals to me.  Flowers…little “jewels”…stuff like that.

I think I have decided on what I want to change the name of this blog to.  I checked on domain pricing when I got home from work tonight and guess what!  It's a LOT cheaper than I thought it would be, so in the morning I'll be buying the new domain name and doing a big reveal.   And don’t worry, I’ll link this blog address to the new domain so you can still navigate to the new one with the insecurechubbygirl.blogspot.com address.  I’ll make sure it autolinks to the new domain.

Friend Making Monday...late as usual

Would you rather...

1. Chocolate or vanilla ice cream?

It really just depends on my mood.  I really, really like both

2. Coke or pepsi?

The diet version of either I’m cool with

3. Cats or dogs?

Cats, all the way

4. Summer or Winter?

Winter for running, summer for everything else

5. Early bird or night owl?

I’m a night owl that tries to be an early bird

6. Baseball or football?

FOOTBALL!!!!  I’ve never liked baseball, though I did play softball on and off as a kid

7. Glasses or contact lenses?

I don’t need them but I think if I did need them that I would try to make contact lenses work

8. Coffee or tea?

I’m a coffee fanatic

9. Mac or PC?

PC

10. Roller coasters or not?

I used to absolutely LOVE roller coasters now they just scare the bejezuz out of me…so, no more roller coasters for me

The Trifecta

The other day, Michelle posted a blog and in it she talked about how you are more likely to succeed if you ask yourself what you’re going to do as opposed to telling yourself what you’re going to do.  And this makes perfect sense to me…I don’t know why I didn’t realize this previously.  When you TELL yourself what you’re going to do, it can make it feel like a chore, like something you HAVE to do…like you don’t have a choice in the matter…whereas if you ASK yourself what you’re going to do, it feels like an active choice and you’re more likely to enjoy it because you gave yourself the choice to choose what you WANT to do.  I sort of practice this now with the whole if it happens, it happens but if it doesn’t, then it doesn’t and I move on with my life and don’t dwell on it.  Speaking of, last week and the week before I only ran twice and I didn’t go to the gym at all either week.  So, on one had I can look at myself as a “slacker,” or I can look at the reality of the situation and say it was most likely due to me being sick.  While I’m pretty sure I’ll get in my 3 runs this week (I’ve already done 2 and plan a 3^rd tomorrow morning…maybe with the training group for the Biggest Loser half marathon!  That’d be fun!), I didn’t get to the gym at all again this week.  Oh well.

 

Good news on the work front, I’m getting my weekends off back.  At least for now, anyway.  It’s always subject to change, but hopefully it doesn’t for a while.  If I keep them, then when my vacation happens the first 2 weeks of June, I can leave after work on May 30^th instead of after work on the 31^st…and that will be awesome…and extra 24 hours to my vacation, so it’ll be like I’m only cutting my trip short by 2 days instead of 3, which is nice.  More good news at work is that I have two 4-day weekends in April.  I had asked for 3-day weekends due to planned races, but I’ll take the 4-day ones without complaint.  Of course, that limits the days I can work overtime on.  I can’t work on either Mondays or Tuesdays those weeks as I can’t double dip with vacation time and overtime pay.  But Wednesday, Thursday and Friday those week I can work overtime.  Can’t work on Saturdays, except for the second of the two weeks because I’ll have a race that Sunday morning.  On that, I still need to register for the Capital 10K race on April 6^th.  Unlike the Biggest Loser half and the Austin 10/20, the price stays the same up until and including the expo day…no price hikes.

 

I know I want to do the BunRun 10K and the Autism Speaks 8K again this year as well.  The BunRun happens at the end of April and the Autism Speaks happens in May.  Also, there’s the Anti-Bullying 5K that, last year happened at the end of March, but this year happens in May that I want to do again.  Then, the half marathon I’ll do while I’m in Oregon.  OMG!  Race crazy, for sure!  I might…MIGHT…nix the BunRun, just for financial reasons, though.  Anyway, after the Oregon half, I have no races until September when I plan to do the Gusto 15K (down in San Antonio and put on by Carrerathon…hopefully they don’t stop taking finish photos at the 1:30 hour mark like they did last year) and the Run with the Heroes 5K.  Hopefully those 2 aren’t on the same weekend.  But, if they are and the 15K follows suit from last year, it will be on a Saturday so I could conceivably still do both.  We shall see.

 

So, I worked a double (16 hour) shift at work on Wednesday.  Apparently the night shift supervisor forgot to ask/tell me that she signed me up to work yesterday as well…so, surprise overtime shift for me!  I’m not complaining, except for the lack of sleep part.  Next week, I have 2 shifts of overtime already scheduled and I don’t plan to pick up a third.  I really am trying to keep it to only one or two shifts a week.  I miss out on too much exercise and it weakens my awesome immune system and I’m starting to get burnt out on it and I’m losing sleep and free time to pursue my hobbies (like my new scrapbooking hobby that I’m so excited about!), which means I’m not decompressing enough and I’m in “work mode” too many hours a week.  But, mostly it’s the losing too much sleep and being cranky and bitchy at work.  Never a good thing…no matter who’s book you’re reading.

 

On the subject of my scrapbooking…you may have noticed that I started a running scrapbook.  I’m going to chronicle all my races.  Most have supplied me with pictures either during or at the finish, or both.  There was a couple that there were no pictures for at all.  But that’s okay because I still have my bibs for those races.  I’m really enjoying putting the pages together and feeding my letter addiction.  The next page I’m putting together is for the Autism Speaks 8K 2013.  Wednesday before work, I bought a kid’s puzzle with bright colors so I can glue some puzzle pieces to the page as puzzle pieces are the symbol for autism.  I also want to get letters that look like those wooden alphabet blocks to title the page with.  I can’t seem to find them on sheets in the scrapbooking section, but I did find a huge box of them on Walmart.com for $25.  While I’d rather not spend that much money on one type of letter, if I can’t find another option, I’ll be forced to go with it.  I’m having problems finding an image of all 26 letters and 10 numbers online that I can just print out, but I’m going to try that before I spend $25 on a huge box of them.

 

Oh!  So, this morning’s run was going to be with the free training group for participants in the Biggest Loser 5K and half marathon.  The half marathon peeps are going to do 5 or 6 miles and I think the 5K-ers are doing a mile or two.  The run was to start at 8am, I woke up at 8:20.  I was so confused as to why my alarm didn’t go off, so I check the alarm and it’s set for the WRONG DAY…next Thursday.  Ugh.  Seriously?!?!?!  So, I missed the run that I really wanted to do.  Instead, I ran 4 solo miles.  It was still a good run, but it wasn’t as fun as it could have been had I made the group training run.  Also, after that run there was going to be a discussion about avoiding hitting “the wall,” but alas, I didn’t get to take part in that either.  So, a total of 20 miles for this week.  Not bad.  Next week, I’ll take it somewhat easy.  5 miles Monday morning, then 3 on Wednesday and 2 quick or 3 regular on Friday.  Saturday morning before work I’ll hit up the packet pickup…not sure if there’s to be a small expo with it or if it’s just strictly a packet pickup.  Then…the next Sunday is the half marathon!  My 3^rd so far and I’m pretty excited.  I can’t wait to see the bling they’ll be handing out at the finish line!  Medal #4!!!  Then, 2 weeks later is the Austin 10/20 and medal #5!

 

Before work today, I registered for the Capital 10K!!!  This will be the second year I have run it.  I really enjoyed running it last year and am really looking forward to this second round of it.  I am now registered for what I’m going to call my trifecta of races…hahaha.  First one: 3/30 – Biggest Loser half marathon, 4/6 – Capital 10K, and 4/13 – Austin 10/20.  That’s 3 Sundays in a row!

Friend Making...Wednesday?

Holiday Traditions.

1. Do you celebrate St Patrick's Day?

I don’t have a set way to celebrate, but I do like to get together with friends and go out and do something.  This year, I went with a few friends to a Celtic festival that had bagpipers, Irish dancers, bands playing traditional Irish folk music and traditional Irish folk-style music.  Then, we were going to go to a place called Sherlock’s Pub & Grill, but they were slam-packed so we went to the Mexican restaurant across the road instead.  It was a LOT of fun!

2. Which is your favorite holiday to celebrate?

Christmas.  I just love giving gifts.

3. Do you have a favorite 'holiday' food?

Desserts.  Hahaha.

4. What do you think of holiday parades?

I like to watch them if they’re available to watch…either on tv or in person is good for me

5. Have you ever been part of a parade?

Yes, back when I was a kid my dad (owns his own business) had a float and me and my brothers were all on it.

6. Do you decorate your house for the holidays?

No, but I live in a 3^rd floor apartment, so that’s mainly why I don’t

7. Do you send holiday cards?

Sometimes…but only to really close friends and family members.

8. Are there any holidays that you celebrate that are traditional in another country, but maybe less well known in the US?

Not that I’m aware of.

Lost The Spark

Apathy

-noun

1. absence or suppression of passion, emotion, or excitement.

2. lack of interest in or concern for things that others find moving or exciting.

Apathetic

-adjective

1. having or showing little or no emotion.

2. not interested or concerned; indifferent of unresponsive.

As I mentioned the other day, I’ve been feeling very apathetic lately.  I don’t know why.  It is seriously getting on my nerves, though.  I’m not doing my workouts as I’ve planned to do them.  I’m skipping runs.  And all because I’d rather stay in bed.  This isn’t good.  I self-adjusted my medication thinking that would “fix” it, however that only “fixed” it for like 2 weeks, and now it’s back to what it was before.  I’m sure that, like I said before, that my being sick had something to do with it because I just kept pushing through the sickness and then I was exhausted and now all I want to do is sleep or just lay in bed.  It’s horrible.  I want to get back to where I was. 

I’ve lost all motivation.  I’ve lost my spark.  I’ve regained the weight.  I did my 2 month weigh in for the competition on Saturday and I’m back up to 189…that’s where I was at the beginning of the year.  I need to do the Shred diet for like 2 or 3 weeks.  I know it works.  I just have to skip week 3, which is the fluids heavy week (loads of smoothies, shakes and soups).  I’m just constantly wanting MORE in that week, so it’s a very frustrating week for me and I’d much rather just skip it. 

I really do want to get back down to 179 or less by the time I leave for Oregon at the end of May.  So, by May 31^st, I want to weigh in at 179 or less.  That would be a loss of 10 pounds in 2.5 months.  I can do that.  That’s basically 4 pounds a month.  Totally doable.  I just have to do it.  But to be successful with it, I HAVE to be motivated…I have to get that spark back.

So, I want to poll you.  What do you do when you lose the spark of motivation?  What do you do when you find yourself in a slump?  What do you do to get through it and get it back?

Something that I’m hoping might help a little is that I FINALLY started my running scrapbook!!!  HOORAY!!!  Yesterday, I did 3 pages…the title page and then a page for my very first race, the Anti-Bullying 5K 

and then the third page was for my second race, the Capital 10k . 

And today, I started the page for my Run With The Heroes 5K, but need to buy another pack of the letters I chose before I can finish it.  And I completed the page for my first half marathon, the Rock'N'Roll San Antonio half

Feeling a Little Apathetic

It’s been a few days since I posted because I’ve either been busy or I just forgot to write anything up.  Let’s play catch up, shall we?

My last post was Monday...last week.  I had just run a 15K training run (that’s 9.3 miles, folks).  Well, Tuesday, I woke up and my quads were incredible S-O-R-E.  Going up and down stairs was a serious chore for me.  I had to go to the gun range for work on Tuesday before reporting in for my shift to qualify (yes, I carry a gun for work).  Long story short on that, I failed and now I’m not allowed to carry my gun in uniform.  Boo!  I have to go back at the end of May and try again.  Until then, I need to get to the range on my own time and practice, practice, practice shooting my gun to make sure I get a score of 75% accuracy or better.  Yea, I’m not a great shot.  If you’re standing next to the person I’m trying to shoot, or more accurately, squatting down on their right hand side, you’re in trouble.  Funny, but not funny, you know?  Anyway, I get to work and I’m assigned to work a sit-down position.  Great, because not only were my quads sore, but I had just bought brand new orthotic-type arch supports for my work boots and they were a little “pokey” on my arches…and, technically, you’re only supposed to wear them for an hour the first day and then you can add an hour each subsequent day until you’ve worked up to a full day of wearing them.  Yea, I’m one of those dumb people that doesn’t necessarily follow instructions like they should.  Anyway, I didn’t run Tuesday as I was extremely tired when the alarm went off.  I was only planning on a 3-miler anyway, so no big loss.  And I obviously needed the sleep more than the run.  That 15K the day before really took it out of me.  Plus, still on the tail end of the allergies turned sinus infection turned strep-like sore throat turned generic upper respiratory infection. 

Wednesday, I got up on time and headed out for my morning run.  I was originally going to do that rescheduled 7 mile run, but Tuesday I was thinking maybe I’d only do 5.  But, then I settled on doing a 10K (6.2 miles in case you didn’t already know that).  My quads were even more sore on Wednesday than they were on Tuesday.  I get to work and oh joy I’m assigned to work a stand up all 8 hours position.  Of course!  But, by the end of the day, my feet hurt so bad from the new inserts that I no longer cared about how badly my legs (specifically my quads) hurt.  It’s the simple things, right? 

Thursday, I had scheduled “run?”…I didn’t run.  I woke up after hitting snooze a few times and went about the business of paying the bills I had to pay in person ON payday.  I was pleasantly surprised when I went to use the ATM at my bank and they were open!  A while back they had changed their opening time to 11am which is incredibly inconvenient for me.  Well, they apparently got a butt-load of complaints regarding this change in business hours and changed back to opening at 10am…YAY!  So, I went ahead and got the money order for my car payment yesterday instead of waiting until tomorrow or Sunday or sometime next week to get it.  Which meant I could mail it off on the way home tonight.  YAY again. 

I worked a double (16 hour) shift Thursday so all I did Friday morning was sleep for a few hours before having to be back at work this afternoon.  Tomorrow, run #3 for the week…even though I originally wanted to do 4 runs this week to make up for only doing 2 last week.  I was planning on an 8K (that’s 5 miles) for Saturday.  Did you notice the theme in this week’s run distances?  15K…10K…8K.  Yep, it’s a race distances week for me.  So I would've had a total of 20.5 for this week.  Wow.  I haven’t run those numbers since late last summer/early last fall…before my impromptu hiatus from all exercise due to my PTS acting up.  But, alas, it did not happen.  Saturday morning rolled around and i wasn't feeling like getting out of bed, so I changed plans from an 8K to a 5K...then from a 5K to just sleeping in.  Ugh.  I have got to stop this!  I don't know why i'm so apathetic lately!!! 

I guess I’ll list what I want to do as far as exercise thisweek…so, here we go:

• Sunday – 10 to 10.5 mile run

• Monday – 2 to 3 mile run

• Tuesday – rest or gym (lower body)

• Wednesday – rest or gym (lower body)

• Thursday – sleep only

• Friday – run (3 or 4 miles)

• Saturday – gym (upper body)

I didn't do that long run yesterday, I did it this morning.  10.1 miles.

That was my last true long run and now I start the taper for my next half marathon…the Biggest Loser Half on the 30^th.  The 23^rd I won’t run because I’ll be at the renaissance festival again, so long run on Tuesday the 24^th…but I work that day, so only like 5 miles (maybe a 10K again?) probably…since it’s also a tapered long run, don’t want it too long.  I’ll be running races 3 Sundays in a row (half marathon, 10K, 10 miles)…so my weekday runs will be kept to no longer than 3 miles for those 3 weeks.  But, really, there will be some 2 and 2.5-ers just because I will be stressing out my legs once a week at race pace for THREE WEEKS IN A ROW!  That’s a lot to ask of a body.  I’ve never run more than two races in a month and the one time I did that, there was 2 or 3 weeks in between the two races.  I’ve never run 2 races 2 weeks in a row…let alone 3!  

Oh, and since I ran yesterday's run today, I will run today's run either tomorrow or Wednesday...or maybe just do 2 miles each day?  I dunno.  We'll see what I feel like.

I’ve been mostly good about sticking to my Lent abstination (I think I just made that word up, but you know what I’m saying) from eating unplanned food.  Yesterday I didn’t plan right for my double shift and had to stop at Subway for a sandwich.  Then, when I arrived at the second shift location, they were having a going away party for one of the officers and I was offered pizza and cake and cookies and, I’m sad to say, but I partook of the offered food.  Oh well.  I don’t feel guilty about it.  I am a little disappointed in myself for not sticking to my “promise” yet again.  But, I, once again, plan to go back to doing my best to stick to it.

I'm sorry I've been hit or miss with posting the last few weeks...I've just been so apathetic lately and I don't know why.  I guess maybe the whole allergies turned sinus infection turned strep-like throat turned possible general upper respiratory infection played a role.  I'm just hoping I can get out of this funk soon.

Anyway, good news, with this morning's 10.1 mile run done in 1:52:56 and with it feeling HARD, I have no doubts I can hit my goal of running the Austin 10/20 in 1:55:00 or faster as that is 10 miles.

Following Through

Okay, I am officially tired of all this crap that came about because of my allergies.  The sinus infection.  The chest congestion.  The proliferation of boogers in my sinus cavities.  The occasional fever.  The being tired all. the. time.  So sick and tired of being sick and tired.  I have rescheduled my 7 mile run twice now and it STILL hasn’t happened.  I was so sure it was going to happen Sunday morning.  So sure of it.  But it didn’t.  The alarm went off and ugh.  Just ugh.  I’m so frustrated with everything right now.  So, everybody remembers what I posted Saturday about what I wanted this week of exercise to look like?  So, here’s the “revised” edition now that I didn’t feel up to running (again) this morning:

• Sunday – rest

• Monday – 9 mile run (ended up 9.3 miles)

• Tuesday – run

• Wednesday – run (7 miles?)

• Thursday – rest…pay bills

• Friday – sleep only…worked 16 hrs Thursday night

• Saturday – gym, upper body (2 mile quick run?)

I really hate it when I don’t follow through on something.  Which is extra frustrating because I’ve been doing that a LOT lately…not following through with what I’ve said I was going to do.  If I can’t (or just don’t for whatever lame reason) get the 7 mile run done on Wednesday, then I have to let it go.  I just have to forget about it and move on with life.  I will have to just accept that it didn’t get done because I was sick and that’s just a fact of life.  I have to remove any guilt I feel from not doing it if I don’t get it done. 

I posted on the Facebook page on Ash Wednesday that I was going to give up eating any food that I hadn’t planned on eating that day when the day started.  I’m very ashamed to say that I have not kept that pledge even one little bit.  I planned to start over again today.  I’m going to really apply myself and do my best to stick with it.  From tomorrow through Easter, no unplanned food, with the exception of going to festivals (Austin Celtic Music Festival and Sherwood Forest Faire), of course…but, I will be planning to just eat whatever is available to eat at those festivals.  But, so far, so good.  My eating was not out of control today.

I worked overtime at my job on Sunday.  That made 7 days straight and 9 shifts total worked.  I know that part of the whole me being tired, too tired to run, Sunday morning was because of working so much over the previous week.  I got to work and I was crossing my fingers that my supervisor would see me and then ask me why I was there.  Too bad, so sad, he didn’t.  I had to stay.

So, I need to make a point to make sure I follow through with things.  I’m only letting myself down and hurting myself by not following through.  But I’m also hurting you, the reader, by not following through with what I say I’m going to do.  How?  Because I’m not being a very good role model.  I mean, yea sure, you see that I’m a real person with real life struggles and ups and downs to work through and THAT part is good.  But the fact that I’m not being a woman of her word (something I’ve always prided myself on) really bothers me and doesn’t do me or you any good at all.  I must change this.

Something that might just help me be more accountable to myself and to you is remembering that I’m participating in a fitness challenge.  I definitely haven’t been acting like I am.  I for sure am not eating like I’m in one.  I’m going to have a crappy 2^nd weigh in (March 15^th) and pictures.  But I think, if I can just reapply myself that I can have a great 3^rd weigh in on May 15^th.

A blogger friend of mine suggested I try the Amy’s Indian Mattar Paneer frozen dinner and then let her know what I think of it.  Well, I had it on Sunday and I definitely like it.  The chunks of the Paneer cheese were probably my favorite part.  I love cheese.  Haha.  It will be one I buy and eat again.  Thank for recommending it Carina!

This morning, I got up, took the car to the mechanic.  I was going to walk the 1.3 miles home, but the owner offered me a ride because I don't live that far away.  They said it would take about 3 hours...but it took 4 hours.  I at first tried to go back to sleep...no go.  Just laid there for an hour before giving up.  I got on the computer and managed to waste 2 hours with that.  Then I got bored, so I started doing some chores.  Vacuuming and spot cleaning the carpet.  I was going to do more, but the mechanic called.  No offer to pick me up though...so I set out to walk.  I started up my Nike+ Running app for the walk and then went to plug in my earphones and listen to music while I walked.  However, my music refused to play...in fact, according to the Google Music app, there was no music to play.  WTH?  I restarted the phone, but that didn't fix it so I gave up.  Picked the car up, went for a planned burger and fries, then set about hitting up the Half Price Books stores around the Austin area, plus Hobby Lobby (I actually left without buying anything!!!!  Nothing was on sale.), Barnes & Noble, Kohl's, JC Penney's, and a couple comic book stores.  I found a couple pocket Russian phrase books with phonetic pronunciations included.  YAY!  I opted not to buy a dictionary because there was no phonetic pronunciations.  Boo!  I bought a few comic books with pictures that I want to draw.  

I got home and then got ready to head out for my run.  I was hoping the issue with my music earlier in the day was for some reason due to using corded earphones and that the music would play just fine with my bluetooth earphones.  Nope.  So I spent the next 45 minutes attempting to get ahold of and talking to customer support and we finally figured it out.  Somehow the music got hidden.  No idea why this is an option for what to do with your music on the phone, but yea, now if it happens again I know what to do to find it again.  SO, at 9pm I head out the door.  I get a little bit away and decided belated to check the weather and it says 30% chance of rain, so I go back and grab my rain jacket and tie it around my waist.  I didn't need it, it never rained.  It sprinkled a little tiny bit in the first mile, but then by miles 4.5 the clouds had broken up and there was moonlight.  I had to take a couple walk breaks.  I have never before taken a walk break during a training run.  First time for everything, right?  But, 9.3 miles (15K) in the bag.  I seem to always forget that if I go more than 3 days without a run that I have shin splint pain for the first 2-2.5 miles and it's very annoying.

Well, bed time.  I've got a 3 mile run planned for tomorrow morning.  Gonna try to do it fast-ish...hoping for 10:30 per mile.  We shall see.  Right before work, I have to go to the gun range for work and do my annual shooting qualification.  Wish me luck!

Friend Making Monday: Vacations

Vacations

1. Where was the last place you went on vacation to?
I went up to Dallas, TX for 5 days with a friend for my birthday a couple years ago

2. Do you have any plans for a vacation this year?
Yes!  Going to visit my family for a looooooong overdue trip in June.  Also, a road trip with my friend Amanda to Dallas, TX for my birthday and for me to run my first full marathon!

3. If money was no option, where would you dream vacation be?
Basically, country hopping to every county in the world I’ve ever wanted to visit.  Ireland, Scotland, England, Iceland, Spain, Egypt, India, Thailand, Japan, China, S. Korea (I lived there for 4 months before but I’d love to go back as a tourist), Australia.

4. What is your favorite vacation spot that you have visited?
In my whole life?  Probably a tie between Yellowstone Park and Florida for Disney & Epcot

5. Have you ever had a staycation?
I have them frequently, actually

6. Are you a lie on the beach person or a go out and explore person?
I am definitely a go out and explore kind of person.  But, I could probably make myself hold still on the beach for a couple hours.

7. When you fly do you have a favorite airline?
Whichever one has the cheapest tickets.  Haha.

8. Have you ever had a ‘vacation from hell’ ?
Nope

9. Have you ever had an airline lose your luggage?
When I was a kid and I think it was on our trip to Florida for Disney & Epcot…we had a layover in Minneapolis/St. Paul and had to stay the night and the airline had lost our luggage.  It was stressful for my parents, but I was really too young to care much.

10. Do you send postcards to friends and family when you go on vacation?
No, but I buy the cool ones to put in a scrapbook.

An Emotional Thing

Monday, while driving to work, my check engine light started flashing.  A little background here…my check engine light has been on forever…so the flashing is new and somewhat frightening.  My car has been due for an oil change for quite a while now.  I had decided on Monday afternoon that I would get up early on Tuesday and go to the mechanic right when they open, go back home, run, take a nap and then go to work for 16 hours.  When I got home, I had changed my mind and decided I would just take the car on Monday, on my day off and that I would sleep in on Tuesday, so I set my alarm for 8:30am.  So, Monday night I went to bed with the full intention of sleeping until about 9 (alarm goes off at 8:30, then I reset it for 9 before actually getting up).  That was all well and good until I woke up Tuesday morning at 6:44am WIDE AWAKE.  Ugh.  I did my best to go back to sleep and then finally just relented and just reset the alarm for 7:30 and laid there and waited for it to go off.  I got up, ate some egg salad on a whole wheat bagel, then headed for the mechanic.

At the mechanic, I told them I needed an oil change and a code check.  They asked me if there were any specific fluids I needed topped off.  I told him about the parking brake dash light coming on periodically and flashing and making an alarm at me.  He then informed me that wasn’t indicated that just my brake fluid was low, but most likely that it was low because the pads where worn down significantly, thus causing the fluid to be low.  So we went with the premium oil change because that included a tire rotation which would allow them to inspect the brakes.  All done with the oil change and my brakes are in DESPERATE need of repair.  And not just the pads.  The rotors are warped and need to be turned (this is a mechanical term that is synonymous with “machined” or, in other words, means that they put it in a machine that evens out the surface) and also, because the fluid is now low, the system needs to be flushed and bled.  All of this to the tune of $554 after labor and tax and such.  Joy.  I don’t have that kind of money just lying around.  I wish I did, but I don’t.  I applied for their franchise credit card and amazingly got approved for a $400 limit…so that helps…a LOT.  I’ll take the car back in on Monday (I would have had them do it Tuesday morning, but it would have been cutting it close for me to make it to work on time), use the card for $400 of it and the owner said he’d let me bring in the remaining balance when I get paid later in the week.  YAY!

Alright, so, back home shortly after 9am, so I get changed and ready for my run.  I get on MapMyRun and set about creating a new 4 mile route.  I didn’t want to run my current 4 mile loop because it’s boring.  Haha.  So, I created a new one that goes through a couple different neighborhoods, so it’s not boring and seems to go by faster.  It was a well-planned route too because I had an overall average pace of 10:29 per mile!  It’s pretty funny because when I checked the stats, miles 3 and 4 were exactly the same!

After the run, I showered and then got back in my sleep clothes, set my alarm for noon and laid down for an attempt at a nap.  I kept waking myself up because I was snoring.  Hooray sinus issues!  Not.  I finally managed to get to sleep and got a solid 20 minutes before the alarm went off and it was time to get ready for work. 

Thursday was uneventful…just a severe lack of sleep for the amount of time I had been awake.

Yesterday, Friday, I was planning to get up by 9am and go for a 7 mile run.  However…when the alarm went off, I felt not great…in fact, I made a noise similar to the groan of a zombie when the alarm went off.  Haha.  I opted to sleep in.  When the alarm went off again a couple hours later, I felt much better and quite well rested.  I showered and then got dressed and headed to Target to buy some frozen meals, hopefully mostly Indian food meals.  I succeeded and was quite happy when I found a frozen meal of my absolute favorite Indian dish…well, sort of.  It’s my favorite sauce: tikka masala.  It’s my absolute favorite when it has lamb it in, this has chicken in it.  I did get a lamb vindaloo meal as well and vindaloo is similar to tikka masala…just a little spicier.  So, yea, I didn’t run yesterday morning.  I partially regretted it.  As I’ve mentioned now many, many times, I am no longer in the business of making up miles I’ve missed.  But…7 miles.  I’m having a hard time letting go of a 7 mile run, especially since I AM training for a half marathon again right now.  I NEED my long runs in order to be properly trained.  So, if IF I feel like it tomorrow morning, I will do that 7 mile run.  I haven’t decided yet if it will be in addition to my 3 regular runs next week or if it will just take the place of one of my shorter runs for next week.  That decision will be made as the week goes on.

Here’s what next week may or may not look like as far as exercise goes:

• Sunday – 7 mile run (?)

• Monday – 9 mile run

• Tuesday – gym, lower body

• Wednesday – run

• Thursday – run (?)

• Friday – sleep only

• Saturday – gym, upper body (run?)

There’s a question mark by Thursday’s run is that it may not be done at all…I have to pay bills and run errands that morning.  Also, I put “run?” in parenthesis for Saturday because if I don’t run on Thursday, I might want to run on Saturday and if I do run on Saturday, it will just be a quick 2 miler right before my gym workout like I did last week.  If I do that, I’m going to see if I can go faster than 19:22 minutes for the 2 miles. 

I finished reading Stephanie Meyers’ The Host Friday night and started reading The Gunslinger by Stephen King.  The Host was phenomenal.  I now desperately want to see the movie.  Monday, when I go in search of a used Russian dictionary and Russian phrase book (oh yes, did I tell you that I have decided I want to learn Russian?  At least at a mildly conversational level, of coruse), I plan to see if I can find a used copy of The Host on DVD.  Now, I’ve read The Gunslinger before.  It’s the first book in The Dark Tower series.  I’ve actually already read the first 4.5 books.  Read them when I was with my ex-boyfriend 3-something years ago, but when we broke up he took the books with him and I just didn’t care about anything anymore at that point so I never went and bought the books for myself to finish the series.  Between my friends Amanda and Vanessa, however, for my birthday and Christmas in December I received all 7 books in the series, so now I’m reading them and I’m going to read them all!

So, I’ve been rather “snacky” lately.  I find that I frequently want to just eat and eat and eat and eat.  It’s not that I’m hungry, because I’m usually not when I feel like this.  So, it’s purely an emotional thing (cue the 90’s group Shakespeare’s Sister).  I’ve really got to get a handle on this whole eating thing.  It’s going to be the end of me if I don’t figure out a way to control it.  I really, really want to be back below 180 by the time I leave to go to Oregon at the beginning of June.  The ONLY way that’s going to happen is if I can learn to show some continuous restraint and willpower and control over myself.  The last couple days, I did manage to talk myself out of stopping at Wendy’s or McDonald’s on the way home from work, but only by promising myself that I would go and have a “real” burger on my day off (Monday) after I get the brakes on the car fixed.

Okay, so, my plan for Monday is be at the mechanic by 7:45am so I can be the first person in the door and the first car in the bay to be worked on.  This mechanic is VERY popular and does excellent work and has excellent customer service, so they get busy FAST…and I don’t want my car to be there allllllll day.  I have other things to do.  After I pick the car up, it’s burger time.  Then, I’ll make my rounds of all the Half Price Books stores I need to in order to find the things I want to find.  Then, around sunset, I’ll head out for a 9 mile run.  Somewhere during the day, I need to do chores (vacuum, laundry, dishes, grocery shop, put away clean clothes, straighten up dining room…too much STUFF has accumulated on the table, oh and refill the cats’ 5-gallon water dispenser).

The only lady that “outranks” me on my shift at work will be going to the morning shift at the beginning of next month.  This *may* mean that I get my Saturday/Sunday days off back.  I’m not going to hold my breath, but she’s the reason I lost those days off and had to go with my second choice of Sunday/Monday off.  If I do get the weekends back, then I won’t have to use a vacation day the day before races to make sure I can do packet pickup without stress and to make sure I get to bed at a reasonable time the night before as well.  Also, it will mean I can leave for Oregon an entire 24 hours earlier than currently planned!

Cold Snap

I haven’t posted for a few days, so let me do a recap of what’s been going on.  Sunday, I went and met a couple friends for lunch, then we went to some stores.  We ended up at Academy so I, of course, bought a couple new sports bras because some of mine are pretty much worn out and need to be tossed.  I have to take one of them back because I didn’t realize it was cotton instead of the wicking material.  After I left their house, I went to the fabric store to use a 50% coupon I had and get me some black fabric that I need for future use in skirt making.  After that, I went home and about an hour later I got ready and drove to the gym.  Oh, I should explain because I think I last posted that I was going to run 7 miles on Sunday.  Soooo…a cold front blew in nice and strong on Sunday and it was COLD and WINDY and a little rainy too.  I’ve said before I can do the cold, but the wind turns me into a big sissy.  Also, besides all that, I was still dealing with the chest congestion and sinus issues, so I didn’t think it was a good idea to try and run in that for over an hour.  So I decided gym on Sunday, run on Tuesday.

 

I got to the gym and this is the workout I did:
• TRX bicep curls 4 x 20
• TRX tricep extensions 4 x 15
• TRX deltoid Y's 4 x 15
• chest to military press on exercise ball, 1st set with 10# did 20 reps very easy to do, 2-3rd sets 15# did 10 reps very difficult to finish
• bent over rows w/20# dumbbells 4 x 15

I skipped the abs portion of the workout because when I attempted the obliques exercise with the TRX straps, I didn’t feel I was doing it right, so I just opted to skip abs.  I’ll find and watch a video on youtube about how to properly do that exercise the next time.

After the gym, I took a shower, of course…then I headed out for dinner with a new friend.  We talked for a good long while and it was really nice.  He and I are going to be really good friends and he’s a vendor at the renaissance festival so he can give me advice and such for when I go in a few years to try and be a vendor at the festival as well.  Awesome!  Makes me even more excited to start that chapter of my life.  Of course, I won’t be able to commit to it until after I’ve [hopefully] gone through and passed the basic peace officer’s course in 2016.  Between now and then, I’ll do what I can to beef up my inventory and then I’ll take 2017 to beef up that inventory even more and then in 2018, I’ll apply for a booth at the Sherwood Forest Faire festival in McDade, TX! 

 

Anyway, after dinner with him, I stopped at the grocery store on my way home to get my food for the week.  I bought some “healthy” frozen dinners (I say healthy that way because really, how healthy is a frozen dinner, even the Lean Cuisine and Healthy Choice, etc ones) and a BUNCH of fresh stuff…fruits, mostly.  I love fruits.  Something I’ve noticed a lot of people I follow on Instagram doing lately (the healthy bloggers) is taking a picture of their grocery store haul.  So, I figured I’d start doing the same thing.  I didn’t include the frozen dinners in the picture, but they were all SmartOnes and Indian food ones.  In fact, I think I’m going to go out of my way to find Indian (and Thai) food frozen dinners in the future and eat those more than the other “healthy” ones

 

Monday, I had a dentist appointment at 9 to fill another cavity.  Joy.  I was there until almost 10, then I had to hit up Sam’s Club for a pallet of 16 oz bottles of water.  Then I went to Hobby Lobby, bought a stencil I need to make a “RUN” wall plaque and a couple other things.  By the time I got home, it was 11.  And I felt horrible.  Worse than I did on Sunday.  So, I just laid down until it was time to get ready for work instead of running.  Sometimes, rest is more important to your body than getting exercise.

 

I went to bed shortly after getting home Monday night so I could get lots of sleep and feel better today.  It worked.  While I didn’t feel great when I woke up, I definitely felt better than yesterday.  Before I go further with what I did today, here’s what my phone and the Weather Channel app said about the weather last night:

So, yea, freezing temps AND freezing rain overnight.  What does that mean?  It means frozen sidewalks which means running outside is not safe or a remotely good idea.  So, I hit the treadmill this morning.  Before I did that, I had a brilliant idea to help make my time on the treadmill less dreadful.  I downloaded the U-verse app and now I can watch shows I’ve recorded on my DVR on my phone!!!  So awesome.  

 

Tomorrow’s weather is supposed to be waaaaaay better than today’s and the last couple days’ weather.

I’ll probably eat a whole wheat bagel with egg salad in it in the morning.  That’ll be really good pre-long run fuel. I'm planning to get that 7 miler done...finally!  I plan to be out the door no later than 10, so that's low 40's.  7 miles, that's an hour and, say, 15 minutes (over estimate).  So, done and back in the apartment and in the shower by noon.