Lost The Spark

Apathy

-noun

1. absence or suppression of passion, emotion, or excitement.

2. lack of interest in or concern for things that others find moving or exciting.

Apathetic

-adjective

1. having or showing little or no emotion.

2. not interested or concerned; indifferent of unresponsive.

As I mentioned the other day, I’ve been feeling very apathetic lately.  I don’t know why.  It is seriously getting on my nerves, though.  I’m not doing my workouts as I’ve planned to do them.  I’m skipping runs.  And all because I’d rather stay in bed.  This isn’t good.  I self-adjusted my medication thinking that would “fix” it, however that only “fixed” it for like 2 weeks, and now it’s back to what it was before.  I’m sure that, like I said before, that my being sick had something to do with it because I just kept pushing through the sickness and then I was exhausted and now all I want to do is sleep or just lay in bed.  It’s horrible.  I want to get back to where I was. 

I’ve lost all motivation.  I’ve lost my spark.  I’ve regained the weight.  I did my 2 month weigh in for the competition on Saturday and I’m back up to 189…that’s where I was at the beginning of the year.  I need to do the Shred diet for like 2 or 3 weeks.  I know it works.  I just have to skip week 3, which is the fluids heavy week (loads of smoothies, shakes and soups).  I’m just constantly wanting MORE in that week, so it’s a very frustrating week for me and I’d much rather just skip it. 

I really do want to get back down to 179 or less by the time I leave for Oregon at the end of May.  So, by May 31^st, I want to weigh in at 179 or less.  That would be a loss of 10 pounds in 2.5 months.  I can do that.  That’s basically 4 pounds a month.  Totally doable.  I just have to do it.  But to be successful with it, I HAVE to be motivated…I have to get that spark back.

So, I want to poll you.  What do you do when you lose the spark of motivation?  What do you do when you find yourself in a slump?  What do you do to get through it and get it back?

Something that I’m hoping might help a little is that I FINALLY started my running scrapbook!!!  HOORAY!!!  Yesterday, I did 3 pages…the title page and then a page for my very first race, the Anti-Bullying 5K 

and then the third page was for my second race, the Capital 10k . 

And today, I started the page for my Run With The Heroes 5K, but need to buy another pack of the letters I chose before I can finish it.  And I completed the page for my first half marathon, the Rock'N'Roll San Antonio half